by Jerome Enriquez John
India never runs out of excuses for rape. Politicians blame Western culture. Parents blame mobile phones. Society blames clothes, nightlife, alcohol, Instagram, modernity, everything except the one group responsible: men who commit rape, and the culture that entitles them to do so. Rape in India is not a problem of “bad women making bad choices.” It is a problem of men raised to believe they have the right to police, control, judge, desire, and access women — regardless of women’s consent. This is a deeply uncomfortable truth, which is exactly why India avoids it.
Every year, India churns out data more disturbing than the last. According to the National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB), India recorded over 4.5 lakh crimes against women in 2023, including rape, assault, trafficking, abduction and harassment (Business Standard).
The NCRB dataset shows that India continues to register one rape every 17 minutes, with many states showing alarming year-on-year increases (Times of India). And here is the statistic that destroys every moral-policing argument: 94% of rape survivors knew their rapist (Times of India).
The conviction rate, meanwhile, remains abysmally low, barely 27% in many years, meaning three out of four accused men walk free. A country that prides itself on family values cannot explain away the fact that its daughters cannot walk safely, travel safely, date safely, marry safely, or even stay at home safely. The danger is not in dark alleys; the danger is in living rooms, bedrooms, tuition centers, offices, and marriages.
Male entitlement in India does not appear out of thin air. It is cultivated, through family structures, media, religion, schools, and the state. Girls grow up hearing “don’t wear this,” “don’t go out,” “don’t talk to boys,” while boys grow up hearing “boys will be boys.” One gender is trained to shrink; the other is permitted to expand without responsibility. Bollywood, for decades, has aggressively sold stalking, harassment, and emotional manipulation as “romance,” where “no” is only the beginning of a plot, not a boundary. Patriarchy is rehearsed first at home, where sons eat first and daughters serve, where sons roam freely while daughters justify every movement, where obedience becomes the definition of virtue.
Schools teach math, grammar, and geography, but almost never consent. Sex education is still banned or discouraged in many states; teachers skip crucial chapters; parents treat desire as shameful. The result: boys learn about sex from pornography and misogynistic online spaces, not from any ethical or humanising framework. In the digital age, YouTube “alpha male” influencers, WhatsApp bro-groups, and pseudo-science self-help gurus spread the same dangerous belief that women owe men attention, submission, and access. Men are not taught to respect. They are taught to expect.
This is why the argument that “Indian men are sex-starved” is not only lazy, but dangerous. Research shows rapists are usually not sexually deprived, and rape is not about desire — it is about power, domination, humiliation, and control. If sexual frustration caused rape, married men would never rape, and the most gender-equal countries would have the highest rape rates. Reality proves the opposite. The “sex-starved man” myth exists to shift blame away from perpetrators and onto the women who “refuse.” It implies women owe men sex — which is the very definition of entitlement.
The state, meanwhile, is not an innocent bystander. Institutions meant to protect women often reinforce patriarchy. Human Rights Watch and multiple investigations have documented police shaming survivors with questions such as: “What were you wearing?”, “Why were you out?”, “Why didn’t you scream?”, “Did you provoke him?” Officers still refuse FIRs, still advise “compromise,” still treat survivors with suspicion rather than concern. Medical systems have been no better; despite a Supreme Court ban, the degrading “two-finger test” was used in many states until recently. Courts send contradictory messages — cases drag for years, survivors face character assassination, and powerful men often get bail because their “reputation might be harmed.” Politicians trivialise rape with comments like “boys make mistakes” or “women should stay home,” signalling to society that male behaviour is not to be questioned, only female behaviour is.
The social and economic cost of this violence is staggering. Sexual violence destroys lives, futures, families, and communities. Survivors lose education, economic opportunities, mental health stability, relationships, safety, and dignity. A 2024 study by the Institute for Health Metrics and Evaluation estimates that violence against women costs India 1–1.5% of GDP annually in lost productivity and healthcare burdens. Yet misogyny remains cheaper than reform.
Here is the truth India continues to deny: women are blamed for rape because men cannot tolerate accountability. Every time someone asks, “Why was she out late?”, what they mean is, “We prefer protecting rapists over confronting patriarchy.” Every time someone insists, “Women should dress properly,” the message is, “Our men cannot behave unless women restrict themselves.” Every time police question a survivor’s character, it communicates, “Our men are not expected to follow laws.”
India loves calling itself the world’s largest democracy, but half its population cannot live freely without fear. This is not a women’s issue — it is a national issue, a human rights issue, a masculinity crisis.
India does not need stricter dress codes, more moral policing, more curfews for women, more culture lectures, or more ancient-value sermons. India needs men who understand consent, families that raise sons rather than predators, police who believe survivors, courts that uphold dignity, and schools that teach respect instead of shame. Because the biggest lie ever told in this country is that women cause rape. The truth is painfully simple: rape happens because too many Indian men believe they are entitled to women’s bodies — and society never taught them otherwise.
India must stop disciplining its women. India must start reforming its men. Until that happens, freedom will remain dangerous — not because of women who claim it, but because of men who believe they can take it away.
Author and human rights activist who writes on governance and social issues. He can be mailed at jerome221983@gmail.com
